I used to be a proud multitasker...

Until recently, I was proud of the fact that I could do multiple things at the same time.  It was a skill that came in handy as a college student, a teacher and definitely as a mom.  I thought it was essential.  And then I started my treatment program.  All of a sudden, I am learning how multitasking is not effective for my well-being.

The more I learn about mindfulness and being in the present and how important it is to my mental health, the more I am trying to practice. But let me tell you it is hard!  I never before realized how much my mind wanders.  And that is an understatement.  I am constantly in the past or the future.  Dan has often called me “mind-racing girl” when I am laying in bed with thoughts streaming of things that need to be tackled or accomplished.  I never stopped to think about the implications.  While I know that I will still need to be organized and plan for the future, and acknowledge the past, I also know I need to spend a lot more time living in and enjoying the present.  I am currently working to pull my mind back to what I am doing at least 30-40 times a day.  And it can last for about 5 seconds or 5 minutes.  And then I have to do it again.

The more I practice, the more I can do it and the more I find that I am enjoying time spent with my friends and family.  I am working to observe what is going on around me and my connection to whatever that is.  Watching a movie, eating a meal, bowling, or even driving in traffic I am encouraging (I was going to say forcing) myself to live in the moment.  

Don’t think that I am going to be spending long periods of time doing meditation or becoming a yogi master, although I am planning to try to take a few minutes a day to ground myself and practice mindfulness (in whatever form works best for me at that time).  Hopefully over time this will become easier and easier and it will become second nature; until it does I will have to just consciously focus on learning and practicing.

Full disclosure: I am still struggling to give up the multitasking habit… I am currently snuggling my little one on the couch, watching Despicable Me with her (for the 1000th time), and typing this at the same time.  I am going to finish this post and go cuddle my girl while she watches the movie.  As for me I am going to focus on thinking how wonderful it is to curl up on the couch with her on a Friday night.