Stages of Depression? It should only be that easy!

This blog post has been floating around in my head for the past couple of weeks as I have not been in a place or had the time to sit at the computer to write more than a sentence or two. The topic is something so many of my friends have heard me lament about - the stages of depression - or lack thereof.

Think of the word “rain.” It can be described as a drizzle, a mist, a hard rain, a deluge, flood, it can be teeming or a downpour or a storm.  Each of those allows the speaker to more accurately convey the precipitation than using the generic “rain.” And even though one man’s “downpour” may be another one’s “deluge” both would probably agree that they are in the same ballpark.

A "short downpour" from a recent (delayed) flight.

Now think about how many people use the word “depression” or “depressed” to describe so many varying degrees of mental state or illness. I know that before 2014 I, and many of my friends and loved ones, had never heard or thought much about the differences in depression and how using such a generic term can sometimes confuse people.  Polite conversation rarely mentions major depressive disorder, dysthymia, seasonal affective disorder, psychotic depression, or bipolar depression (to name a few). Each of these illnesses presents in different ways and there are varying symptoms and severities of each. (Honestly I would have loved if my major depressive disorder had come with the weight loss that so many people experience).  

I was trying to think of an analogy other than cancer to illustrate my point, but that is probably the most obvious. Most of us have unfortunately had friends and/or family members who have been diagnosed with cancer. One of our first questions of concern are about the stage it is in.  Yes, the National Institute of Cancer is able to categorize illness from Stage 0 to Stage IV depending on the intensity of the cancer. This information allows people to know how to respond and what might be needed to help their friend or family member. Many of those diagnosed with stage 0 don’t even require treatment. I doubt that those who are “lucky” enough to get this diagnosis think that they are able to understand what people who are going through chemotherapy, radiation or other treatments for more advanced stages are experiencing. And rightfully so; however, this is not the case for depression.

I have had so many good intentioned people trying to be helpful by telling me how they, or friends or loved ones, were able to fix their depression and insisting that it would cure me. Others have been visibly irritated or disbelieving when my recent depressive episode continued (would like to consider it past tense) longer than they expected (based on prior experience). I wish there was a way to explain and get the word out there that depression is often not just depression. There are sometimes just small nuances or often major differences between each person’s experience. And medically there are different types of depression. And no one should assume that they know what someone else is going through.

Depression is not fun - I think I have stated several times that it sucks and I believe there are very few people, if any, that enjoy fighting this battle for any amount of time. If someone you encounter is dealing with any type of depression please remember this. Thanks!